I Can’t Believe I’ve Been Married for 30 Years!
By Kelly Wright My husband, Hartley and I just celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary. We met on the school bus when I was 12 and he was 14. We started dating in high school and dated through college, getting married on June 19, 1993.
The forecast for our wedding day was cloudy with a high chance of rain.
I had prayed for weeks before our wedding that it wouldn’t rain that day. A beautiful, sunny day was what my heart desired. It wasn’t that I don’t like rain or that we were getting married outside, because I love rain and we were getting married in a church. But on my wedding day, I didn’t want to mess with rain. Rain was not what I had pictured on this day I had dreamed of for so long.
Thankfully, it didn’t rain before or immediately after our wedding. But, when we left town for our honeymoon, it started to rain – like the exact moment we left the city limits. Scattered showers slowly began, and the rain was just enough to need the windshield wiper fluid. The windshield was a mess with all the
“Just Married” paraphernalia and Hartley was having a hard time seeing through the gunk. This wouldn’t have been an issue except the groomsmen had replaced the wiper fluid with Mountain Dew (as a prank to get him back for all the ways he had tortured their cars on their wedding days, I’m sure). And in case you don’t know, Mountain Dew does not work as wiper fluid. It only makes things much worse.
So, our first stop as a married couple wasn’t the hotel where we were staying before flying out to our honeymoon location. The first stop of our married life was Wal-Mart to get wiper fluid.
Not at all what I had expected or could have even imagined.
What I expected as I left our wedding reception was a joyful two-hour car ride where Hartley and I recalled all the details of our amazing wedding. Where we would be overwhelmed with excitement and shock that we were finally married after six years of dating. That our favorite love songs would play on the radio as we began our perfect honeymoon and our perfect life together.
But instead, we were at Wal-Mart getting wiper fluid.
What struck me as we walked down the automotive aisle just hours after walking down the aisle at our wedding was Hartley’s patience and flexibility. He thought it was hilarious and even though it was a pain and totally unexpected, he rolled with it.
And I have to say that Hartley has been this way through most, if not all, hurdles we’ve faced these last thirty years.
Opposites definitely attract because I’m not usually patient or flexible. I like things to go the way I want or think they should go. So, for God to bring Hartley and I together has been the greatest gift.
Hartley is the kind of guy who as an Enneagram 7, brings joy wherever he goes. He loves to make me laugh and surprisingly, he still can after all these years. He has been my biggest supporter and still gets a kick out of surprising me. He is the best dad and is always up for any fun adventure you put before him. Most importantly, he loves God with everything he’s got, and he loves me next.
It's crazy to think that we have been married for thirty years.
When people ask me our secret to a successful marriage, I say there is no secret. Marriage is challenging and probably the greatest and most difficult relationship you will ever be in. We both know that without God we most likely wouldn’t have made it this far. God has seen us through every challenge, every hurt, and the hundreds (or maybe thousands) of conflicts we’ve had. So, I guess if I had to name a secret, I’d say it’s building your life and your marriage on God.
I wanted a beautiful, sunny day on June 19, 1993. And it was mostly sunny, with scattered showers. I think that is pretty reflective of marriage.
We go into marriage wanting the sunny days and praying away the rain. But marriage has good days and challenging days. Things can get messy, and you end up with Mountain Dew in your wiper fluid. Most days you have to pivot and work together. Marriage is usually never what you expect, but often so much more than you could have ever imagined.
To my sweetie, Happy Anniversary. Here’s to at least 30 more!